Our marriage testimony…

Once I was asked the question “How has being a christian effected your marriage”?  Below is my response…

I have been a follower of Christ as long as I can remember. I was raised in christian home, and I am so grateful to my parents for this heritage.  My husband had been raised in a similar way, similar heritage.  However, I realized early in our marriage that he did not truly have a personal relationship/walk with the Lord.  We fell out of the routine of going to church and seeking the Lord.  After many years (about 8) we found ourselves with a marriage in ruin.  We were a prime example of what happens when you take God out of the marriage.

There were lies, betrayal, and an appearance of no love left.   I wanted us to seek counseling, get back into church, etc.  My husband wanted out.  He was literally running from our marriage and God.  He tells me now, that it all changed one day, when he knew that God spoke to him and he realized that he had to change.   My husband came to me, and said he wanted to make things work.  He would go to counseling (a christian counselor) and that he wanted  our marriage to last.  I know that the only reason we are together now is because my husband finally turned his life over to the Lord.  He also asked me to forgive him of wrong doing.

Now, this is where the non-christian marriage would have ended (and some christian marriages).  I, however, could not do that.  The Holy Spirit kept reminding me, “Jesus has forgiven you. He commands us to forgive others.”  I knew if Jesus could die for me, and forgive me of all my unworthiness, then I had to do the same for my husband.  I am not saying it was an easy thing to do.  However, God heals broken hearts, and can mend any marriage.  You have to be willing to work hard, endure many tears and then there is a blessing beyond any you can imagine.

Our blessing was a restored marriage and our Gracie.  After 13 years of marriage, we had our Grace.  We named her Grace because it was only fitting.  God had showed such Grace to us through the healing of our relationship with Him as well as with each other.  We are now active members of a church, are surrounded by wonderful christian friends, and we seek the Lord to lead our lives.  So, how has being a christian effected my marriage, well, I wouldn’t be married today.  I would not have had the hope, known the healing, and experienced the forgiveness to allow my marriage to be made whole.

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{ 29 comments… read them below or add one }

Brittany August 16, 2010 at 11:32 am

So thrilled for you all! My husband and I also went to a Christian counselor…BIG difference from a secular one. Thank you for sharing this…very encouraging!
Ps. LOVE how you have a Compassion button…I’m a volunteer advocate for them 🙂

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Lisa August 16, 2010 at 3:16 pm

Thanks, Brittany for your sweet words. Also, my husband and I just became sponsors through Compassion International. We are so excited. We are sponsoring a little girl who is only one month older than our 3 year old daughter. 🙂

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Anonymous August 18, 2010 at 4:58 am

Hi! You are an encouragement. Thank you. I share a similar story. Except that I can see that my marriage will head to destruction if we don’t put God first. I wish and I pray that my Husband will have a love for the Lord. My heart’s desire is to see him as the spiritual head of our family.

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Lisa August 18, 2010 at 8:16 am

I will pray for you and your husband. God heals marriages. I do know this!

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cheryl October 5, 2010 at 3:15 am

Dear Lisa,
You’re are such a blessing and inspiration to others! I can relate to your story in every sense of the word. But, in my case I was the one who had to change. Christ was an absent member in our marriage for many years. I concentrated more on my career and being successful at my job than spending quality time with my family. We were literally living past each other. My husband was the one who took the kids to church. And about a year ago my marriage reached rock bottom when my husband said he wanted out and was prepared to make a life with someone else. I was ready to throw in the towel and end my life. But, God is a wonderful, forgiving Father. He came to my rescue [our rescue]. I realised that I had to change and it is only through the grace of God that I am still married to my husband of 17 years today. We both realised that God has to be the focal point of our marriage.

Be blessed,
Cheryl

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Lisa October 5, 2010 at 4:54 pm

Cheryl, thank you for sharing your story with me. God is so great. I know I am so thankful for his mercy and grace in my life and marriage. May God continue to bless you and your family. 🙂

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Carrie October 20, 2010 at 2:24 pm

Late to this, but just wanted to say I really enjoyed reading your story. God’s grace has definitley given me the marriage I always dreamed of with my best friend of seventeen years. So I too can attest to how if you let God lead your life, marriage included, that you should just hold on, cause the ride will be amazing. 🙂 You have a beautiful story and I am glad to know we share friendship as well as marriages that strive to follow the Lord. Love you girl!

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Lisa October 20, 2010 at 7:21 pm

Thanks, Carrie. I am so glad God has brought us together as friends!

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Debbie March 31, 2011 at 12:27 am

Thank you for sharing your testimony and the restoration that God has done in your marriage. My husband and I are both Christians and this is both our second marriages. We went through a very difficult time in our marriage but God continues to be there for us. I have not felt comfortable sharing with my friends which has been kind of hard for me. I know God is working on me concerning forgiveness but it seems to be a very slow process.
Thanks again,
Debbie

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Lisa April 1, 2011 at 10:04 am

Thank you for your kind words. Our God is one of second, third, and fourth chances. So thankful He never gives up on us in life, our marriages, etc. 🙂

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Sharla June 15, 2011 at 7:42 pm

Thank you so much for being willing to share the testimony of how God worked to save and restore your marriage. I often need reminders that my marriage will weaken unless we invite God into it.

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Lisa June 17, 2011 at 5:30 pm

Hi Sharla. Thanks for your kind words. Yes, God is so needed! Glad you stopped and commented. 🙂

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shaolin July 4, 2011 at 9:26 pm

My wife of 25 years wanted a separation last july out of the blue. It tore apart that she wanted to sepearate. she explained it because of things that happend years ago and that she was hard on me, and surpress her feelings. she told me she only married me to make her self legal in gods eyes, it hurt deeply but I tried to hang in my marriage, I started reading what god has in his word for marriage and vowed to stand for my marriage, my wife still brings up things from the past, no infedelity on either of us, just excuse after excuse, our marriage is based on sex
I asked god to heal my marriage, yest feel i am beating my head against a wall ,please say a pray to heal my marriage, all that left

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Lisa July 20, 2011 at 11:19 pm

Lisa, I love your simple post! My husband and I almost lost our marriage last year. We are both Christians and I’m thankful that eventually we were able to work through it and I was able to forgive him for what had happened. Ever since then we have dedicated our lives more to the Lord than before, where we were once like you and your husband… fallen out of church and the routine.

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Lisa July 21, 2011 at 10:04 am

I know how quickly it can happen. You look around and say, “Hey! How did we get here?” It happens quietly and like a thief in the night. Satan wants to destroy marriages. I am so glad you and your husband found your way back to each other and the Lord. He will keep the marriage strong. I KNOW this has not been easy for you. I KNOW the pain and the hurt. But, more important, I KNOW the power of true forgiveness in a marriage and the healing power of our heavenly father. Blessings to you and your husband. Thank you for reaching out and sharing with me.

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Michelle September 27, 2011 at 4:23 am

I am so thankful to hear stories like your marriage. I have been married to my husband for over 16 years. We are both christians, but he has not ever wanted a solid relationship with God. He grew up as a missionary kid and still feels the need to rebel against his upbringing. Alcohol has been his mistress and has caused great problems for us. This is compounded by the fact that I was abused by an alcoholic father growing up.

We are currently in christian counseling, but he flat out says either I except him the way he his or I can leave. I am trying to focus on my relationship with God, but every day get hurt by the things he says and does. We have 3 kids, and it is really hard. Please pray for us (Joel and Michelle). I believe God wants to heal our marriage, but I need patience and my husband needs to put God first in his life. Thanks for listening.

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Lisa September 27, 2011 at 7:09 am

Michelle, I will pray for you. Thank you for sharing your story with me.

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amber April 24, 2012 at 9:15 pm

Hi! I just read this and am so thankful that you have shared your story. God is amazing and does great things. We are so unworthy of his continued grace. My hubby and I use to be partiers and didn’t have a marriage that had God center and then he used the worst year of lives to make us grow closer to him. I am so thankful now for those hard times because we have since felt the call to ministry and are in the middle of our journey through seminary!

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Lisa April 24, 2012 at 10:29 pm

Thank you so much for leaving this comment. God is truly amazing. I am so thankful for what He has done in my life and I am so glad He did the same for you! God bless you and your husband during this journey. 🙂

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Jo September 10, 2012 at 6:45 am

Lisa I can relate……the Lord Jesus Christ has saved our marriages,relationships,and our souls….we are so very blessed..thank you for sharing.

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Harriet September 11, 2012 at 3:07 pm

You are brave to share this testimony. Most people would shy away from sharing their hardships. But you have used it to share Jesus and how He can heal anything and anyone.
My husband and I will celebrate our 25th in October. Although we have not shared your hardships, marriage in itself is a daily “job” that we must work at. Add three children to the mix and it becomes even harder. God has been faithful and we are grateful to Him for all he continues to do.
Thanks for sharing you story.

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Lisa September 11, 2012 at 4:24 pm

Thank you Harriet for your kind comment. 🙂

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vanessa belfon rennie February 16, 2013 at 3:18 pm

i need help to save my marriage

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Mary April 4, 2013 at 9:54 pm

I was in a relationship for 13 years and had 6 children. It seemed a happy relationship at first but became stormy characterised by promiscuity. After many struggles i gave up and walked away pregnant with the 6th child on 31st may 2010. I broke down and prayed to God and he saw me through upto child birth. My son is now over two years. I have been standing on the lord for my marriage and the first breakthrough is when we spoke after 2 year silence. He has broken ties with one woman but is still stuck on the second woman. I have a calling from God to get back to my husband and i need help because he is still with the other woman and also has not given his life to the lord.

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Lisa April 8, 2013 at 10:36 am

That is a huge burden and hard to see an end when he remains with the other woman. Praying for peace for you and healing. Thank you for sharing your story with me.

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Jane February 7, 2014 at 7:15 am

Just reading lots of difficult journeys out there. I have found a website that has helped me a lot and many people have experienced restored marriages. It’s encouragingwomen.org I’d recommend it to anyone, from this address there is a link for men as well.

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William Morgan February 25, 2014 at 6:24 am

Thanks for your post. It brought me hope. My marriage is hurting as a result of my own actions. I’ve brought much pain to my family. There has been no affair just verbal and emotional abuse. My wife and I have been married before, we have no children together. At this point it seems like an impossible situation. I truly want things to work and I know God can bring life back to our dead marriage. Please pray for William and Tara. She is surrounded by negative influences, and as mentioned, I have not been the Godly man she once thought I was. Thank you!

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Cris chance March 31, 2014 at 12:19 pm

Your testimony was so awesome to read. I have been married for 10 years. I married my husband when I was really young (18). He was 21. He is a soldier and has deployed many times. He has PTSD and bipolar disorder. My husband can be very hurtful at times and he has always been this way since early on in our marriage. I have prayed so hard for my marriage and my family. We have three children and I just want him to see us as his family not distant thoughts. He has threatend divorce once again and this time I have given it all over to God. I want God to step in and I know he will. I’m so exhausted trying to fight this battle that I have been fighting for so long.Please uplift us in your prayers. (Chance family). Thank you and may God continue to bless your family!

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dav March 31, 2014 at 3:25 pm

My wife and I are separated and I have been praying fervently for her return and to see that I have surrendered my will to God. Her heart is closed and I cant see how my prayers are affecting her. I am a good man and can be a great husband with Gods help. Please pray for her return.

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